Not Ready.

Everything in life is transition. Everything. Finding that place where things aren't changing, or we aren't preparing for something new is fleeting beyond measure. Tomorrow marks the last official day of summer. And I'm in complete shock. What? No. They start school WHEN? Wednesday? No. THIS WEDNESDAY? Are you sure? Wow. No. Really? Shit. I'm not ready. Where are the lazy, sleep in days? Where are our PJ days? What about waking up and having a whole day/week/weekend with nothing planned, nothing to do? What about late nights and lazy poolside afternoons? Did we do any of that? Did we do it often enough that it will make a permanent mark on their memories? I'm not sick of them. I am not ready for a break, not quite yet. (this part's new). I have really enjoyed them this summer. I've got awesome, amazing kids that are tons of fun to be around, and now I'm supposed to send them away? I'm not ready. I mean, technically, yes. We have backpacks and supplies (thanks Aunt Melissa). We have sneakers. We have a lunchbox. We have first day of school clothes. We have met our teachers, seen our classrooms, and know our bus schedule. And yet. I'm not ready.

I'm not ready, but they are. They are ready. Getting his supplies made Daniel tell me he's never felt so grown up and important. Daniel is ready for science. Daniel is ready for homework, and learning stuff, mom. Whatever, just, you know. Learning. Matthew is ready. He's got his folder, and on it has his preschool specials schedule, his name, and his number (5). He has library on Day 1, and preschool Gym on Day 6. He's got Batman backpack, Spiderman sneakers, and aliens on his first day of school shirt. He's ready to be one of the 'big kids' in Mrs. Law's Montessori room, ready to help the new kids out when they need it. Ready to be separated from Daniel, not just in the afternoon or by age/learning level, but physically in a separate room. THEY ARE READY.

I am not.